Getting a divorce isn’t easy, and finding your first post-divorce apartment isn’t easy either. Being served divorce papers can come as a shock, whether or not you’ve seen it coming. It completely changes the course of your life in so many aspects that you start to feel lost and hopeless.
However, there are two ways of looking at this. You can either see it as the end of all those things you’ve shared together, or you can look at your divorce as something liberating, a chance to pick up the pieces and rebuild your life – this time, the way you want it to be.
The best way to do it is to roll up your sleeves and get to work – literally. Find a post-divorce apartment you love and design it in a way that will help you cope with divorce and prepare for all the good things that are coming your way. Let’s look at some of the ways you can start all over and create a home that will help you go through your divorce more easily.
Your first post-divorce apartment should:
It should be affordable
First things first, once you’re divorced, you will need to get a new place to live. Divorces are costly, so you’ll need to work with what you’ve got. You will probably need to downsize and look for a place that is affordable and in line with your needs. Finding the right place at an affordable price is no easy task, so you’ll need to determine your budget before you decide on the apartment.
According to some calculations, your rent should not exceed one-fifth of your monthly income, one-quarter at most. It would be best if you would detail your income and monthly expenses down to the penny to have a clear insight into your financial situation and the price you should be aiming for.
It should look and feel like home
Once you’ve settled in your post-divorce apartment, think of the ways you can make it look more like home. That means personalizing it and using your creativity to design a space in which you’ll feel comfortable. Paint the walls in your favorite color, and decorate with things that truly speak to you. Get a couple of fluffy throw pillows for your sofa to make your living space more inviting.
Get a cozy rug that will provide you with a sense of warmth and comfort while you sip on your morning coffee, and add some inspirational pictures and artwork. All those things will help you create a place that will serve as a retreat from the outside world, re-instilling a sense of safety and security as you step into a new chapter in your life.
It should be vibrant and lively
Now that you’ve got all the place to yourself, you can pour all your time and energy into making it your own. Decorate your home with things that spark joy in your heart and bring a smile to your face. Get some houseplants that you can take care of.
Get a pet who you can love and nurture, who will always welcome you when you get back from work. Open your windows to fill your space with sunlight, making your room feel bright and airy. All those things will help your new home feel more vibrant and lively, adding a dynamic to your living space and nurturing your spirit.
It should say that you’ve moved on
Getting over someone we used to love can be hard, especially if we’re the one who’s been left. However, you can’t allow yourself to wallow in despair, especially now that you’re beginning a new chapter in life. That is why you should consider getting rid of everything that reminds you of your past relationship. Purge the past by going through your things and discarding any objects that carry memories of your life together.
Your wedding albums, the gifts they bought you, and even that picture you bought on your honeymoon – all that has to go. Now that you’re starting over, you don’t need anything that can hold you back – divorce the things, and divorce the memories. Doing so will help you get a new perspective on life, what you want to do and who you want to be, propelling you towards a bright and exciting future.
Life after divorce doesn’t have to be bad. It’s all a matter of perspective, and instead of thinking about what you’re losing, you should look at all the things you’re gaining – time, freedom and a new chance at life. Wave goodbye to your past and start your new life in a place that will celebrate who you are and be a source of happiness and inspiration as you turn over a new leaf in the book of life.
Lilly Miller is a Sydney-based graphic designer and a passionate writer. She loves everything about home decor, art history, and baking. She shares a home with two loving dogs and a gecko named Rodney. www.twitter.com/heyoitslilly
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