During my marriage I learned and experienced at least 100 things that have contributed to my life. When I breathe them in and honor my life by honoring my experiences, I bask in the joy of emotional freedom. My list of the gifts of my marriage looks like this:
How can I resent a man who has given me so many gifts? The gift of my son alone is reason enough to honor Dan for the rest of my life. Listing the gifts allowed me to see all that I had gained through my entire experience. At a time when I could see only pain and disappointment, looking for the good, the gifts, and the lessons opened me up to a place of authentic appreciation for my partner. It gave me a choice of realities in which to live. I could choose to remain in the painful reality of what didn’t work, or I could choose to celebrate in the joyful world of gratitude.
Excerpted with permission from Spiritual Divorce by Debbie Ford (2nd edition, HarperCollins, 2006). Please revisit our site this December for the full excerpt or purchase a copy of Divorce Magazine. Click here for Divorce Magazine’s interview with Debbie Ford when the book was first released.