My wife of two years has a male, single friend whom she’s known longer than me. She likes to “hang out” with him a lot, at his place as well as in public. He comes to our house occasionally as well, both when I’m there and when I’m not. I’ve asked her many times if there’s anything going on, and she always swears they’re just “buddies” and nothing more. Yet she spends almost as much time with him as she does with me. Am I just being paranoid or over-possessive, or am I right to be wary?
I’ve filed for divorce against my husband of seven years. He has generally treated me well and been a good father to our two children. Several months ago, however, he confessed he “might” be gay and has “experimented” with affairs with a few men. He also has a few disturbing, secret fetishes that I discovered by accident. Since I filed, he has sincerely begged me to take him back: he has decided he’s not gay and that I shouldn’t take his odd sexual deviations seriously. But I feel like he’s a total stranger to me now. Should I learn to accept and trust him, or move on?
I’ve never considered myself a shallow person until now. My wife and I have been married for nearly 10 years. Shortly after our wedding, she rapidly started gaining weight and never stopped. Now I have absolutely no physical attraction to her and am even embarrassed to be seen with her in public. She knows how I feel about the weight issue but has never done anything about it, even when I offered to help. I can’t stand to be with her anymore, but I’d die of guilt if I left her. I feel like a jerk for feeling this way, but I also wonder if I’m wasting my life with her. What should I do?
I’m engaged to a guy whom I’ve been seeing for several years. I foolishly decided to fool around a little before getting married, and I ended up falling hopelessly in love with another man. I want to call the wedding off, but this is extremely complicated: his family and my own have become very close friends. The wedding date is set; big plans are being made; everybody has high expectations! How do I get out of this one?
Dear In a Pickle,