If you are going through divorce, how can therapy be of benefit to you?

If you are thinking about or going through divorce, how can therapy be of benefit to you?

By Dr. Lami
September 10, 2013
CA FAQs/Divorce Process

Ending your marriage will generate emotional challenges that may require learning the skills of how to cope with the difficult mental, physical and financial process of uncoupling.

There are various forms to conduct therapy sessions for divorcing people: (a) on an individual basis, (b) family sessions with your children and yourself or with your ex-spouse, (c) a couple wishing to work together in a healthy, constructive manner.

As an individual who is going through divorce you can face many challenges, from experiencing uneasy feelings (e.g. guilt, fear, anxiety, anger, blame, shame, fragmenting, depression, grief, sadness, resentment, disbelief, shock, etc) to facing endless changes. Therefore seeing a therapist can help you:

  1. Gain a rational perspective;

  2. Equip you with the necessary skills to go through this challenging time;

  3. Process and let go of negative emotions;

  4. Gain better understanding on the dynamics that got you to the point of divorce;

  5. Teach you how to help your children;

  6. Learn to better communicate with your ex-spouse;

  7. Gain coping skills;

  8. Create a brighter future.

Generally anyone who participates in therapy during uneasy times will benefit, not only by learning more about themselves, but also by shifting their perception during this life transition, and see it as an opportunity for growth with a possible brighter future.

If a couple chooses to go to a therapist together, they can work on anything they wish to resolve. Nevertheless, they can also utilize the mental health professional to act as a type of mediator to help set guidelines to ensure minimal hostility and emotional damage. The therapist can help resolve other issues like living arrangements, financial obligations and parenting responsibilities.

In cases where children are involved, it is extremely important to take them to therapy. During a divorce, parents are consumed with their own feelings, and the children's emotional state is often overlooked. Supporting evidence shows that children of divorcing parents tend to experience loss, guilt, hurt, pain, abandonment and overwhelming confusion. They worry that they are the cause of the divorce and are torn in their loyalty to both parents. In cases that parents are aggressive with each other, the children tend to develop fear that they are to blame for their parents' disharmony.

If you are thinking about or going through divorce, how can therapy be of benefit to you? - Part 2

Dr. Lami is an internationally renowned psychologist with over 18 years of experience helping her clients effectively deal with challenges associated with the process of divorce. Her services include Psychotherapy, Coaching, Evaluation (including Affluenza), Expert witness, Speaking and Consulting. She regularly writes on relationships and has been featured in the media. Visit the firm's website at drlami.com or universalinsights.net.

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September 10, 2013
Categories:  FAQs

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