Yes. I am a big, big believer in reaching out and getting the help that is available from trained mental health professionals. There seems to be a stigma, a hesitancy to go into therapy or go into counselling because it makes us look bad or it makes us look weak.
Nothing could be farther from the truth. A divorce is a horribly traumatic experience. It’s not one that we’re wired to handle on our own. Now, you don’t have to go to a paid psychologist or a paid psychiatrist, there are other options available. There are community divorce groups. You can go into an anonymous group setting with other people that are going through a divorce. You can share you story, you can listen to their stories, and you can benefit from the collective energy of these support groups.
You can go to your priest, pastor, or rabbi for advice, or at least you a receptive ear or active listener who can help you. You can also find a friend that’s been through the process before. One of the ways that you can heal from divorce is to admit that you are in a divorce and admit that you need some help in healing. Once you get past those hurdles and are in a position that you can start talking through your problems with somebody that is able to listen, then you’re going to go miles and miles toward healing.
So, I always to encourage all of my clients, if you can afford a professional, that’s the best route to go, but don’t ignore the other options that are available and once you’ve identified those options, please do take advantage of them. You are only going to help yourself.
John Harding is the principal of the law firm of Harding & Associates in Northern California. He practices family law litigation and divorce mediation exclusively.