One of the most challenging aspects of divorce is the separation of marital property. Wedding gifts, presents from one spouse to the other, and other items of sentimental (and monetary) value acquired during the marriage are decidedly difficult to divvy up. But once the dust settles, you may find yourself with several items of considerable worth that you a) don’t really need, b) never really liked, or c) remind you of “
Begin by doing a little research to determine the current market value of your items. Visit the reference department of your public library or do a Google search. Once you’ve determined their worth, make a few phone calls to local antique or consignment stores to see if anyone is interested in buying them. Be prepared to negotiate with the dealer, taking into account his or her commission. You might also consider taking a table at an antique market or, if you’re Internet-savvy, sell these objects yourself on an online auction. It’s the perfect, anonymous way to turn these unwanted items into cash. (One friend of mine even sold her wedding dress on the Internet!)
The best-known, most reputable online auction house is, of course, eBay. Once you check out the site, you’ll see just how easy it is to sell on-line. The process is simplified by the site’s detailed how-tos.
For tips on selling to antique or consignment stores, consider Tony Hyman’s Trash or Treasure Guide to the Best Buyers: How and Where to Easily Sell Collectibles, Antiques & Other Treasures. For expert eBay advice, check out eBay for Dummies by Marsha Collier and How to Sell Anything on eBay… and Make a Fortune by Dennis Prince.
Looking for a great, kid-friendly divorce resource for your children? Look no further than the PBS website It’s My Life. Created by the U.S.-based public broadcaster, this award-winning site really knows how to speak to kids. Its pages offer children of all ages discussion, information, games, and advice about friends, family, and body to school, emotions, and money. For divorce-related resources, point your browser to www.pbskids.org/itsmylife and choose “Divorce” from the scroll down “Other topics” menu. This great section contains video clips from kids who’ve experienced divorce, articles written especially for children of divorcing parents, an online poll, statistics, and quizzes about divorce and children, and more. Kids can choose from articles like “Getting the News,” “Dealing with Feelings,” and “Things will Get Better.” Each is written in an honest, straightforward manner that lets kids know that they are not alone in experiencing divorce.
Another great resource for young teenagers (9-12) is the poignant Billie’s World, a novel by Kim Grossman Finkel about the impact of divorce on an 11-year-old girl. Loosely based on the author’s own experiences as a preteen with divorce, the book explores a number of other issues experienced by young preteen girls, including peer pressure, boys, friends, adults, and self-esteem. Visit www.billiesworld.com for more information.
A survey of more than 3,500 people conducted in May and June by the British pollster YouGov.com for the Yorkshire Building Society found that women are far more likely than men to come out of divorce feeling “liberated, relieved, and happy.” Participants were broken down into two groups: those who were currently divorcing/separated or divorced/separated for less than two years and those were divorced/separated for more than two years. More than half (53%) of the women who had divorced in the past two years said they felt “relieved,” compared to only 46% of the men. Four out of 10 women said they felt “liberated,” but only a third of men expressed the same emotion. More than half the men (56%) said they felt sad at the failure of their marriage while only 45 % of women felt that way. Two out of three marriages fail and more than 150,000 couples divorce every year in Britain.
Rachel Court, head of mortgages for the Yorkshire Building Society, said: “The differences are startling. Women simply appear to be stronger than men through a break-up and after.” The building society’s interest in divorcing couples isn’t entirely altruistic: their new “Fresh Start” mortgage specifically targets individuals emerging from a break-up or divorce. In addition to helping people finance a new home, the service also offers access to independent experts and professionals to help clients deal with the “wider aspects” of their situation, as well as specialized literature, a designated website, and a telephone help-line.
Survey participants value honesty, kindness most in future partners