Everyone is different — everyone has a different relationship with their spouse at the time that they think they want a divorce. The preferable way is to sit down with each other face to face and discuss the problems. Try to come to the conclusion that divorce is imminent, and that is something you should both move forward to in order to move on with your lives. Sometimes you may need the help of a counselor or a therapist to engage in this process of talking with each other face to face.
If you don’t feel comfortable sitting down with your spouse and talking about the divorce, then you can go to an attorney and have them write a letter. If you feel you cannot communicate directly, or through an attorney’s letter, file a divorce complaint through your local sheriff’s department. They will serve a complaint for divorce directly upon your spouse.
William M. Laufer heads the matrimonial department of Laufer, Dalena, Cadcina, Jensen & Bradley, LLC in Morristown, NJ. He has been certified by the American Academy of Matrimonial Attorneys as a divorce mediator and has worked in the mediation process for over seven years. He can be reached at (973) 285-1444. View his Divorce Magazine profile.