If you want your divorce to do little harm to your children, it’s your job to keep down the conflict and keep them out of the middle of problems between you and your ex.
Co-Parenting after Divorce
Divorce is hard enough on its own, but it can be even more difficult to get through when children are involved. Parents tend to have to focus on things like custody battles and doing what’s best for their children as the divorce is finalized.
You may no longer live in the same home but you can bet, if you were married to someone with anger management issues, you will continue to be the recipient of their anger after the divorce is final.
Parents and guardians can arrive at various forms of shared custody. Even when everyone involved puts significant time and effort into planning the arrangement, it doesn’t always work out.
During divorce insanity can ensue and even the best parent can behave in ways that severely damage their children. Below are examples of things parents have done during divorce, things that you do not want to do!
In a “malignant divorce,” a couple engages in hostile confrontation instead of legal negotiation in an attempt to resolve issues such as child custody, dividing marital assets and so forth. As a result of the hostility, there is damage done to not only themselves but their children also.
You may not have your kids this Thanksgiving but you can be thankful you’re not sitting across the table from a turkey!
Anyone who has been in a relationship with a narcissist understands that relying on them to come to the table and rationally cooperate to make decisions for the children is usually not possible. Especially if you initiated the divorce or breakup, the narcissist would take any need to communicate with you as an opportunity to punish, bully, and manipulate you.
Arrests for drunk driving or convictions for driving under the influence (DUI) can be especially consequential, and they could be a significant factor considered in family court proceedings related to the custody of children.
When parents are more focused on the legal process of divorce and their own emotional needs than their children’s needs, those children are irreparably harmed by divorce – and they suffer due to parents who are unable to parent and divorce at the same time.