Ready to Give Up Your Baggage?

Forgiveness is sometimes so hard to give to someone who hurt you so bad, but it is the best way to happiness and a better life. Don’t give up on happiness; follow these steps to forgiving your ex-spouse by Simome Wright.

Divorce Recovery

I have had many conversations with people who are trying to heal their lives and hearts after a relationship and find that they are unable to move on or find a level of true happiness. So many of these people are continuing to hold on to their anger and blame at their partners or their situation. When I ask them, if they have truly forgiven the circumstance – often times they will shrug their shoulders at me and say, “Well, no. How could I, after what happened?” It is then I remind them, that in order for them to heal, they must truly let go of all of it, then and only then can the abundant energy that is needed to recreate a loving heart be released to do its work.


Forgiveness is ‘letting go of the rope’. Releasing your baggage is ‘letting go of the rope’. It is a simple action. A single decision made to release the attachments to what you have been committed to for so long.

How do you do it? You decide to make a choice, just like you would in a game of Tug of War on the playground. The thought occurs to you, “This isn’t fun anymore and my life is not moving anywhere. I would like something different.” And so you take a deep breath – and you open your hands – and you let it go. It is a simple action – breathtaking in its power. And in that single moment, all the energy of the Universe is free once again to assist you in creating the life you want. Your life becomes lighter, your heart becomes lighter and your world reveals itself as a place of true peace and happiness. And the irony becomes, you recognize that you have had that power within you, the entire time.

Questions to Ask Yourself

  • What baggage are you carrying with you? How has it affected your life, your health, and your relationships?
  • How have you made your partners and your relationships ‘pay’ for your baggage?
  • What benefit do you have to carrying it with you?
    • Does it keep you safe and protect you?
    • Does it let you be right about what happened to you?
    • Does it allow you to get sympathy from others?
    • Does it allow you to blame others for your life?
    • Does it give you permission to complain?
    • Does it allow you to continue to be angry, jealous, manipulative or needy?
  • How do you suffer from carrying your baggage?
    • Do you waste energy?
    • Do your health and happiness suffer?
    • Do you alienate friends and family?
    • Do you lose out on love, peace and joy?
    • Do you feel out of control?
  • What relationships have you built around your baggage?
    • Support groups, victim groups, bitch sessions, gossip circles?
  • Are you willing to let these relationships go?
  • Is your baggage TRULY who you are? Are the issues in your baggage more powerful than you are?
  • Who would you BE? What would your life, your friendships, your health, and your relationships LOOK LIKE if you were willing to let go of your baggage?
  • What would it require from you to let it go?
    • Courage? Discipline? Acceptance? Love?
  • What would you need to tell yourself to make it alright to let it go?
    • Write it down. Give yourself permission to release the baggage in a letter to you. Describe how it hurts you, and describe how your life will be different if you released it.
    • Draw a picture of yourself and your life without the baggage – post you’re drawing of your new life on your refrigerator or wherever you will see it every day – to remind yourself of what is possible.
    • Have a ‘going away party’. Give a little ceremony, or create a small ritual to release your baggage.


This article was excerpted with permission from the book Survive & Thrive by Simone Wright, published by Saticoy Publishing ©2007. Simone Wright is the founder, author and developer of Soul Strategies. She is an acclaimed energetic and spiritual intuitive and has books, workshops and CDs derived from her energy work and ideals of healing. www.soulstrategies.com.

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