Are you in a thriving relationship, or has your love dwindled and fizzled out like an old campfire?
Maintaining a happy, successful marriage is not easy. It takes hard work and determination. It takes patience, love, and a whole lot of forgiveness. And frankly, many of us feel tired just thinking about it.
“We’re just going through a phase,” you told yourself when the sex started fizzling out of your marriage and you and your partner stopped communicating. But now that phase has turned into ten years of your lives together and there doesn’t seem to be any remedy in sight. You find yourself asking the same question over and over again. Is my marriage really over?
7 Signs Your Marriage is Over, According to the Experts
You’re Always Thinking About Separating
One sign that you’re in desperate need of a marriage course is if you constantly find yourself thinking about leaving your partner.
Have you ever woken up in the morning and gone to bed at night vowing to yourself, “I’ll break up with him/her tomorrow”? If so, you’re already living in a single mindset. Many couples say that even watching movies can trigger a sensation that they want to be alone.
In a study of 80,000 people, 33 percent of men and women admit that they watched a movie that affected them so much they considered ending their relationship.
If all you think about is ending your marriage, it may be a sign that it’s time to get serious.
There is Infidelity
It is very hard to come back from cheating within a marriage.
When you step outside of your marriage for emotional or physical intimacy, you break the precious trust in your marriage. Once trust is has been broken, it is nearly impossible to restore. Even if you do manage to earn your spouse’s trust, the psychological damage that infidelity does can last for years – even a lifetime.
You Never Communicate
In a survey of 886 separating couples, 55 percent cited growing apart and 53 percent cited a lack of communication as the core reasons for their divorce.
Communication is essential for maintaining a happy, healthy relationship. It creates a foundation of openness and honesty with one another that keeps your relationship strong through the hard times.
If you and your partner are no longer able to be vulnerable with one another, share stories about what’s going on in your lives, or address relationship issues, your marriage is most definitely on the decline.
The Sight of Your Spouse is Irritating
Experts reveal that breakups often trigger psychological distress and an overall decline in life satisfaction. However, if you are in the wrong relationship, the opposite may be true.
Does seeing your partner fill you with joy and reduce your stress or does it cause the opposite to happen?
If you feel annoyed, disappointed, or on edge when you’re in the same room with your partner, this is a huge red flag that you need a marriage course.
Your Sex Life is Non-Existent
Has sex become boring or non-existent in your marriage? Or if you are still being intimate with your partner, do you find your mind wander? Perhaps thinking about someone else?
These are very bad signs that your marriage is in trouble.
Experts reveal that in a study of 200 married couples, participants revealed that physical affection was a strong predictor of satisfaction, affection, and likability in their relationship.
Not only does the oxytocin produced during intimacy help promote bonding, but it can also reduce stress and boost trust in a marriage.
When your marriage is lacking this important intimate element, it can lead you to feel unimportant, underappreciated, and self-conscious.
You Argue Constantly
The Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction is higher when spouses have a strong friendship. Does this sound like your marriage or are you more likely to be at each other’s throats after spending an extended period together?
Signs that your marriage is on the rocks include constantly arguing, looking for reasons to insult one another, and feeling relieved when your partner is out of the house.
Physical, sexual, or emotional abuse are also high-risk factors for getting a divorce.
You’re Not Yourself
One sign you’re in desperate need of an online marriage course is if you don’t recognize the person in the mirror.
You were once a vibrant, energetic, happy person who loved to laugh and was always up for an adventure. But these days you find yourself feeling depressed, irritated, and never wanting to socialize.
If you’re experiencing a drastic change in your personality, your toxic relationship may be the culprit.
How Taking a Marriage Course can Help
There are very few people who will tell you that your relationship cannot be fixed. This is often because there are many ways to restore your relationship to the healthy, head over heels in love, paradise it once was – if you’re willing to make the effort.
Taking an online marriage course can help save your marriage. It can provide you with the privacy that traditional marriage therapy cannot. It also allows you to go through each session at your own pace and from the comfort of your own home.
Marriage courses help couples come together like never before, teaching them about the importance of compassion, different communication strategies, as well as why emotional and physical intimacy is essential to a healthy relationship.
If you haven’t felt like yourself in a while, already feel single, or have sexual issues with your partner, these may be signs that your marriage is over. But don’t give up hope, with a little patience and determination, taking an online marriage course can help you restore the love you thought you had lost.
My husband has psychopathic traits and after being together 15years, married 8, it’s simply become overwhelming to be married to him. I pray for God to take me away peacefully every night. I am living a nightmare and cannot wake up ‼️
I don’t have a a desire to live, because I am blocking him from. Living his own life., without me. But as a Christian, I cannot divorce. It will be. A disgrace to God’s kingdom‼️
If it has become dangerous to live with him, you must protect yourself. Sounds like he has emotionally left the marriage. In other words, he has left you. Some marriages are not of God. “Whatsoever GOD has brought together, let no man put asunder.”
I hear you
It is now affecting me mentally at what point do you draw the line
Been married for almost 30 years and struggling big time going to seek counseling for me but husband will have nothing to do with it
I am struggling too. My husband and I are Christians (which is why we never lived together before we got married, in hindsight was a terrible idea) which is why I find separating so difficult. We dated for about 5 years (with 2 break ups, BIG RED FLAG). Then we got married in March 2020. I knew he had bipolar disorder, but I never realized how traumatizing it could be for me too. One week he will be telling me how much he loves me, then next week he will be cussing me & throwing my stuff at me telling me to get out. I feel emotionally abandoned which is why I have emotionally withdrawn.. I love him, but I also love myself. We have been seeking counseling but I dont know if it is really enough…
I have been married to a bipolar narcissist for 23 years.
He has cheated on me lied to me abandoned me and then turns around when things don’t work out for him acts like nothing ever happened and that I’m crazy to have thought he would as I hold proof he did.
It’s not only traumatic it’s devastating to my confidence and I’ve locked myself in my home for 3 years with minimal communication with friends or family.
Whether my marriage is over or not isn’t really the question… The question is am I ready to leave my marriage because it’s not repairable.
Gets harder and harder as we age and I am no spring chicken. My spouse has been emotionally detached for the past 3 years but works in my family’s business meaning divorce or not he’ll still be an active part of my family and my life.
He travels and cheats with younger women half my age to continue to validate his masculinity. I know it’s time to leave my marriage I just haven’t had the strength and every day I wake up with hope it will change… I pray God will give me the answer because I can’t come to the conclusion myself that I need to walk away.
Do you think my marriage can be saved?
Am I delusional?
Do I divorce for extenuating circumstances?
Will my Son ever forgive me for doing it?
Can I bear to see him with another woman considering he’ll be at any company gathering.
Would anybody ever want me being broken and damaged?
All these questions can only be answered by one thing…
Get the divorce and see what happens.
There is no good answer to ending love.
My wife has been travelling for months on end and, I feel it done..
Thats how i feel only the difference is hes with me on paper but physically and mentally nope…. hes well a narcissistic sociopath… he wont sign divo4ce tho he says were fine NO WE AINT….
I’ve been with my husband 10 years, married 7. I work constantly, he sits at home watch Netflix all day , I clean the kitchen he dirty up every dish. I get off work and instead of going home he wants me to go shopping. He gets a SSI payment. He takes every dime after rent , not bills paid, and daily just spend. I’ve spoken on this before to him
My husband just sits back and any one he can use for money or any thing else he wants through lying, manipulating, and uses guilt as well. I am trying so hard to walk with God in every way but the anger of his greed, lying, and totally selfish ways keeps me crying and so hurt. We can’t talk cus he gets to yelling& cursing. My grand children or family for the most part he don’t want around and cannot spend a night but , I’ve taken in his family, and his grandchildren. Basically he see no wrong in what he does. He wants to control every aspect of not only me but his children , dad, mom, and brother. He feels everyone should do everything the way he does only his way is the right way. I am leaving I’ve prayed for what to do and it’s to leave . I and both families live him but no one can be around for long and it seems I’m stuck. I’ll ask the Lord for forgiveness. I don’t want to I have to leave .
God bless you lavita, you sound like an amazing woman! However, you are enabling him to treat you all this way, you are making it too easy for him, which is not good for you, him, the kids or anyone else. Please stop! Please RUN, don’t walk, away!! Pray for him, and his well-being. But you MUST take care of yourself now. Don’t waste another moment of your God given, precious life in this abusive relationship. Take good care.
My husband has cheated on me both ways physically and emotionally. And every time he gets caught he tells me that there is something wrong with him and he is sorry and I try to go on like nothing is wrong and “try” forgive him. we have 3 kids and I am a stay at home mom. So I have to put on a brave face and pretend everything is ok. I haven’t talked to anyone and I fee it’s slowly killing me. Not sure what to do. Help
Marie, when I was reading your comment, I had to check twice and say I didn’t write that lol. I no exactly were you are coming from. It takes a lot to go through what you are going through believe me on that one. I have three children myself, and after lots of soul searching I come to the conclusion I will not stay in a marriage for my kids sake. Our children are watching our moves we are leading by example. I have boys so I want them to see/know how to treat a lady. You need to ask yourself, Am I still in love with him? Do I get excited when I see him? Do I become sad when I see him? We are not perfect and infidelity happens and sometimes it can be forgiven, however when it happens multiple times and nothing changes then best believe it will happen again. YOU are entitled to be happy YOU need to do whatever it takes to be Happy. We only get one life, do not waste it on someone that doesn’t no your worth. If your not ready to say goodbye that is okay, maybe try marriage counseling, if he truly believe there something wrong with him then he needs to get help and figure it out because if not IT WILL HAPPEN AGAIN. Im sorry your going through this.
I have been married for almost 36 years. We have 3 grown sons. We are not allowed to see any of our grandkids because of the way my husband acts. I feel so guilty for subjecting my kids and grandkids to all of this unhappiness and rage for so many years! I should have been stronger and left many years ago!
I’m afraid to leave but I’m afraid to stay!
I wish that he would die (please forgive me) but then I wouldn’t have to make this decision
My wife told me she don’t care if we have sex, when we do only because I want it not her. My wife haven’t touched me or cuddle with me in six years, I have tried kissing her she won’t kiss me back. If I touch her she acts like she doesn’t want to be touch
Only when she wants to be touched and have sex. Personally I think it’s time to call it quit
Alex after reading you’re message I thought I wrote it. My wife doesn’t like sex as well . If and when we have it I have too ask her . Most of the times she says no . Each day I go to church praying that our marriage will get better and asking the lord to give me strength not to commit adultery. We are an older couple but we are not dead yet . Each day I think I want a divorce so I
can find someone who will want to be with me and enjoy each other’s company. I am afraid to ask because once those words come out of your mouth you can’t take it back . None of know how long we will be on this earth but we should enjoy everyday as it were our last . I want to find happiness tired of being sad and lonely.
My husband suffers from depression and I don’t know how to help him anymore. He’s taking me down with him and I feel like I failing him if I decide to walk away. He isn’t happy with our lives (we are in huge debt since covid) and it seems like I’m the only one fighting for our marriage……and our debt. I feel hopeless useless and dumb. Any pointers? Please be kind. I am so weak right now every time he looks at me with that “I give up” face my heart breaks…..I feel so alone. We moved back to my parents house so we can get back on our feet so I have to put on a fake smile and act like we’re okay. I am so torn and I just wish he’d fight for us the same way I am. 🙁
My husband and are married 16 years. We disagree on everything. I don’t respect his views or ideas. I don’t find him attractive usually. He sucks at parenting. I find him very annoying
I cleaned the toilet and thought of mine as that stubborn stain.
My husband and I have been married for a long time! We have never agreed on anything. We have to live in his hometown to raise our children now after the kids are grown and gone we still can’t move. I feel I have given up most of my life doing what he wants. I had to be a stay home mom because he said. Now I am useless because I didn’t work like him! He turns things around saying don’t love him but lived through him having many sex partners. I can’t believe some times that at 60 I have to think about planning a new life. I want to move on. I don’t want to wait any longer to be happy. So confused
Hi Alison, I know your comment is older but I feel the same with my husband. Have you tried therapy? If you have, has it made any difference?
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My Christian husband has decided to live 3k miles away back with his family. I asked him if he’s prayed about this and he said God gives us the freedom of choice. That doesn’t make sense to me. We made vows and now he wants to build a different life. After 25 years is “I’m bored” a reason to divorce in Gods eyes?