If you’re at a standstill over a hot button issue like child custody or alimony, try to reach an agreement on as many smaller issues as you can to gain momentum in your negotiations. Your divorce attorney can help you identify issues in your divorce that should be easy to settle.
Reframe the discussion by using language that states a position rather than putting forth a demand. For example, instead of telling your spouse, “I want our child 50 per cent of the time,” try something along the lines of, “Our child loves us both and we both love him. As such, I think 50/50 parenting time gives our child the best option to continue developing loving relationships with both of us.”
Check your emotions at the door. The end of a marriage is almost never without emotional fallout. However, make sure to leave the anger, frustration, and jealousy out of the negotiation room. Making decisions based on emotions is a sure-fire way to not get what you want in the long run. Whether it takes seeing a therapist, meditating, or even taking up a kickboxing class, do everything you can to be in a neutral frame of mind when you sit down at the negotiating table.
Bari Zell Weinberger is the owner and managing partner of Weinberger Law Group in New Jersey. She is Certified by the Supreme Court of New Jersey as a Matrimonial Law Attorney.