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Name: lhjdebbie New Member   Title: URGENT! Alimony/Support question

I was married for 21 years to a self employed man. We have three children. We divorced in 2006. I was a full-time Mother for 18 of those years. At the time of our divorce I felt that the financial arrangements were fair under the circumstances. A settlement was made quickly due to my ex's unstable behavior. My ex agreed to pay $4400 per month. $1400 of which is spousal support. This was based on his income that he reported. Since our divorce he has rarely ever paid the full amount. He pays this outside the states child support services and just gives cash or checks on his own when he feels like it. Some months can be as little as $200 to $500. He has threatened that if I go through child support services he will just report his income at what ever he wants and I will get even less. The kids and I have lost our home and have had to be separated. We have been on state assistance and had no food. While he drives a new car, shops and has a comfortable lifestyle. He claims he is making less, although his lifestyle says differently. I supported him with building his business for 21 years. I know I deserve to be treated more fairly than this but I do not know what to do. Obviously I cannot afford an attorney but would love some insight. Thank you!

Name: Barbara_Lynn New Member

Your divorce decree should have included a judgment against your ex for both monthly child and spousal support and may have included statutory interest on any unpaid amounts.

Your state support enforcement agency may be able to help you collect on the back support owed. If you can have transfer your account to the state agency, they have the power to seize any tax refund coming to your ex and apply it to your back support. I encourage you to immediately investigate this option.

In order for your ex to change the amount he pays in support, he will have to file for a modification of the decree with the court. At that time, you have the right to receive ALL of his personal and business financial records through the discovery process. In many states, he would have to prove a substantial change in circumstances before the court would modify the support amounts. Even if he was able to modify the support payments, it is not likely that the court would make such an order retroactive, so you would still be entitled to all of the back support.

One other detail to keep in mind is that because your ex did not make support payments through the state support enforcement agency, he will have to prove how much he has paid. He may have a very difficult time "proving" any cash payments that may have been made.

Good Luck!

Barbara Lynn
www.NavigatingDivorce.net

Name: vickyachler New Member

I am in almost the same situation...am curious as to how yours is going.