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Name: cas New Member   Title: Masons and marriage

My husband is my best friend, the love of my life and the ONLY person I have ever trusted in my life. He just joined the masons and all I feel is extreme hurt and betrayal. I thought I could handle it, but I'm having a hard time with this and it shows. I try to be supportive but it's driving a wedge in a solid relationship. I cannot understand why a "fraternity" that "makes good men in to better men" and is so charitable would be so secret. I know this is the way it was founded in the 1700's. Women are treated differently today than they were, but for the sake of "tradition", the secrecy remains at the cost of marriage. If this fraternity was founded in the times of the caveman, would it be acceptable to pull us "Ladies" by the hair just because this is how it was done? This is another point - I am not an object or a possession, therefore I HATE the term, "his Lady". It used to be mandatory to memorize parts of the Masonic Cipher, but times have changed and now much of that memorization is no longer mandatory. Why can't other things be amended? I'm sick of this and wish he was never accepted. I'm kicking myself now because I didn't do my homework and research about the masons when the three "brothers" came to the home to interview my husband and supposedly me. I didn't know I needed to be in on the interview so I left the room when they came. After the interview was over, my husband called me in because they wanted to know if I had any questions. How could I have questions when I didn't hear anything, and didn't know anything to ask? The only I knew was that I've heard masons did charitable work. I had no idea what I was getting myself and our marriage into. There is NOTHING that is more sacred than the bond of marriage. ANY organization that intentionally demands secrecy between a husband and wife (with the exception of security agencies, of course) cannot claim to put marriage and family first. With the mason mentality, it's all about preserving the brotherhood and tradition of the "fraternity".

Name: WivesClub New Member

I wish I had thrown those masons out of my house when they came for that interview in 1984. I also left the room and had no questions. If I knew then what I know now (nearly 30 years later) I would taken my three children suitcases in hand and told those men to go to masonic hell as we walked out the door. In 2010 after 30 years of marriage I finally had enough and gave my husband 7 days to make a choice between our family and his fraternal organizations. I told him he had to formally resign from ALL his masonic organizations. He did nothing so on the 8th day I filed for divorce. He chose his fraternal organizations over his family – what a guy. I hope other wives don’t put up with the masonic nightmare as long as I did. Keep books with names, dates, places, expenses and any other information relating to your husband’s activities because you will need them for your divorce. If he has a secret email account, secret post office box, computer with a secret password and takes his cell phone calls out of the room then you need to wake up.