Haven't heard that one before? Well, it's true. Both women and men have strengths and weaknesses and some basic human needs. Like women:

(1) Men need proper care and pampering. If it appears that your man has "hit a wall", it may be that he needs a day to himself. If a Saturday comes along and he decides to hop on the sofa and stay there all day -- let him. We all need some downtime once in a while to just "veg out". (If you don't take some, that's your fault!) Indulge him in his belly-scratching, television-watching, eating-everything-in-sight behavior for a day. Let him enjoy doing nothing at all or something special to pamper himself. Some men mentioned that "a day golfing" was their favorite indulgence.

Forbes.com recently reported an increase in male clientele at major spas around the country. It seems that with all the focus in the media on toned bodies and better skin, a lot of men that travel for business are now taking advantage of a little pampering time. Not only are they utilizing the gyms more regularly, they are scheduling massages, manicures, facials, and even seaweed wraps!

(2) Men need recognition and appreciation. Men love to be told by women that they are wanted and needed in all areas of the relationship. Whether it's a discussion about finances, or the children, or projects around the house, make sure your man knows he plays a vital role in your life. If you don't, make a point to always show respect and admiration towards the person with whom you share your life. He will appreciate feeling as though what he does for you is important and matters. Don't you like to feel as though your man can't live without you and what you do for him? Just like we were told as toddlers, the words "thank you" are magic!

(3) Men have fat days. If your man seems distant or agitated or acts as though his interest in having sex with you has waned, there may be a simple, familiar reason. Occasionally, men (some more often than others) may be dissatisfied with themselves in some way, which could be preventing them from wanting to expose themselves to women in an intimate way. They may feel unsuccessful, self-conscious and/or unattractive -- like women when they're having a "fat" day!

More information on relationships: No More Secrets Make Your Valentine Last Soul Dating Discovering Authentic Love How to Negotiate a Relationship Agreement

(4) Men are looking for love. You may think your gruff, stinky, old man doesn't care about the fuzzy stuff, but he does. Of course men like sex, but they also need to feel the security of your loyalty and know that they are loved and accepted for who they are, as they are. Most men want to have that special chemistry with a woman. They want to feel the butterflies in their bellies, and when they do fall in love, they usually fall hard! Often times, though, they can't show how they feel unless they know that a woman feels that way first. But once a man knows that he is being given the support he needs, he will feel more eager to give a woman what she needs. You know when you need a hug or to hear that you're beautiful even with that awful new haircut? Same thing.

(5) Men are insecure. You know what it feels like when he looks at an underwear-clad Victoria Secrets model or comments on his buddy's new girlfriend, right? Well, men can feel the same way. They don't always like to admit it, but when a big strapping dude gives you the eye, or a handsome man asks you out while he's in the men's room, it shakes them up! Men can be just as insecure and jealous as women. Insecurity in men can also be triggered by problems at work, the place from which they draw their feelings of success and worthiness, unlike women who seek security from relationships. In both cases, however, each person needs reassurance, support, and comfort from the other.

Myth Busters

This article has been edited and excerpted from Boot Camp for the Broken-Hearted (New Horizon Press, 2008) by Audrey Valieriani. Based in Jamaica Plain, Massachusetts, Valeriani is the creator of TheAccidentalExpert.com, which provides relationship coaching. You can order her book at www.bootcampforthebrokenhearted.com.