Note that information given in this section cannot take the place of a divorce lawyer. For legal divorce advice about your specific situation, you must consult a qualified lawyer. See our disclaimer.

"I'm in the middle of a divorce but have already fallen in love with somebody else. Is it legal to get engaged before the divorce is final? If so, will it affect the divorce outcome?"

Legal or not legal, it's a really bad idea. First, an engagement is a promise to marry. Legally, you can't marry someone when you are still married to someone else, so promising to do so is not at all wise. While very few people today actually sue their fiancé if their engagement falls through, technically, they could potentially do so. So, legally, it's a bad idea.

Emotionally, it's a horrible idea! Getting divorced is difficult enough when only two people are involved. Adding in a third person (i.e., your fiancé) only makes the process harder -- particularly if you have children. It will make your present spouse angrier, confuse or tear apart your children more, and may even complicate your legal case.

Regardless of how much in love you may be with someone else, wait until after you're divorced to get engaged.

Karen A. Covy, J.D. is an attorney and family-law mediator in Chicago. She owns and operates Midwest Mediation as well as a successful family-law firm. This answer is an excerpt from When Happily Ever After Ends (2006), used by permission of its publisher, Sphinx Publishing, an imprint of Sourcebooks, Inc. She can be reached at (312) 236-1670. View her Divorce Magazine profile.

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